Friday, October 24th, 2003 at the Ashley House on the Otter Banks of North Carolina ( http://www.outer-banks.com/ashley/ )You see a group of six guys sitting around the dinner table talking, laughing and drinking, old friends you assume. You'd be right.These guys have been living here for the better part of a month and the house looks like it's had some mileage put on it. One of the men, a Brit, gets up from the table often to go put something away. You think he's just a BIT more fastidious then the others. You'd be correct in that assumption as well. A big topic of discussion in the group is the fact that they need to add another Executive Member to their ranks, to fill a vacancy.You also notice that one of the men seems to be drinking a bit more than the others. Not that be brags about how much he can drink but there does seem to be some debate about WHO'S drinks are the best. Suddenly this man stands to his feet, "Well Laddies," he blubbers, "you're gonna need your Shetland sweaters and maybe a little rain gear next month. And I ain't giving you any more runway than you absolutely need!"The others exchange concerned glances. Finally one of the men asks, "You mean Scotland?""Sure!" Bellows the first man.The Venezuelan man speaks next, "Scotland. You mean that area over by....""You know," interrupts the first man, still standing, "That place north of England full of raucous types whom Emperor Hadrian spent most of his retirement fund on trying to keep out of England.""Are you sure you want to do that?" the Englishman calls out from in the kitchen."Simple" says the first man again, "two plus two equals Loch Ness and wind up your kilt." He ends with a devious laugh before sitting back down.Probably the smallest man speaks next. "Tony, back in March you promised us warmer weather.""Yeah" chimes in the Venezuelan, "I'm used to living where it's sunny or at least warm every day. We have more Miss Universe winner than every other country!""Awe" Tony sighs, "You're all weather wimps!""Sure Mite," another joins in, "We leeve in temprate climes. It's known to most of the world as COMFORT!"You think to yourself that maybe this is all a big joke. That this first man is taunting his friends with stories of Scotland only to find that once he sobers up he'll be inviting them to Hawaii. (You make a mental note to yourself that this might be kinda funny to do sometime)The two Aussies and the Venezuelan start arguing with the Brit and the guy named Tony about who's weather is best. The smaller man gets up and leaves the table in silence. You follow him into another room where, by the fireplace, there is a seventh man, a big bearded guy who at first looks to be asleep, but then you notice that he's working on his laptop. He's looking up Greek Vacation Destinations - looking forward to December I guess, Christmas on the Mediterranean?
Saturday morning I slip out of the house after breakfast, the others are still fast asleep (well, except for the Englishman who has scheduled a tour aboard one of the Club's aircraft.) The two men make their way to the Kill Devil Hills Airport where there are half a dozen planes waiting. Ron climbs into the Piper Meridian while Alastair situates himself in the Flight Club's PC-12. Before long they are winging their way north into Baltimore, Maryland. (Pict_01) After we landed (not easy in this wind) I'm not sure what happened to Alastair. I made my way over to a British Airways L-1011 (old livery) and just an hour later I was roaring down the runway toward V2! It was an overcast but uneventful day "crossing the pond" and I arrived in Glasgow, Scotland after 9:30 PM, surprisingly clear.Off to bed in a local hotel for the night with some sightseeing planned for the next week. But I awoke in a panic! "So here I am in Glasgow, but Tony will release the actual flight details back in North Carolina!" Quickly I call Alastair - always one to help out! "Alastair! I've messed up and need your help, man." I shout into the phone. He reminds me that it's only 1 o'clock AM on the east coast and he has only been sleeping for two hours...."Oh, sorry," I whisper. "Alastair, I'm here in Scotland but I need you to fax me the FOTM details - I forgot that I don't have them yet."He laughs. "And you think I do?" he asks. "Tony has given us nothing else" he continues, "I'll bring the info over with me when I come"."Great, where shall we met up?" I ask."Flounder...." Alastair sighs, "Could be Glasgow or Edinburgh or any airport with an ILS able to handle the bigger planes. I'll be the 'Proper British Gent', driving a little green MG and wearing a plaid scarf." He tells me."Alastair, that's no...." but my comment is met with a CLICK from the other end of the line. Guess I'll just keep checking my e-mail.That was a huge mistake! Miss....we call her "Money Penny", back at NZFC had forwarded a number of messages to me concerning Club Activities that I had to attend to:
A fine for an unauthorized fly-over in Vancouver, WA from January
Another fine for landing in conditions that did not meet minimums, also from January
About two dozen bills from some paint supply store in Central Oregon
A custodial fee from a resort in Baffin Island Canada, something about "Dung Removal"???
About five bills for aircraft parts and accessories from Alaska (More than half involved nose wheels?). These were clipped to about 20 more bills from France!
Two warnings from the German Air Authorities about non-traditional aircraft....Another fine for flying too low in the Alps, something about an A-6?
A citation about unapproved night landings in New Zealand as well as a note from some irate passenger about the poor service he'd received on another NZ flight?
A note from the FBI about some guy named "Ernest".
A bill from the "Venezuelan Tourism Board" claiming that we took away business from them by "advertising" their beautiful country on the internet!
Two Police reports about stolen Military jets from Hawaii.....Where do these guys come up with all this stuff!?!?!!? It's all hogwash.
Near the bottom of the stack was yet another bill for 60,000 lbs of Jet-A from Denver, CO? We haven't even flown to Denver! "CANCEL - RETURN TO SENDER - REFUSED!" I spent a week of my "vacation" playing political spin-master trying to get rid off this pile of garbage Miss Penny had sent. I swear what this Club needs is a person who seems really nice and willing to help but who, in reality does nothing to solve your.....ALASTAIR! He's perfect for the job - just like the flight plan I have YET to receive!Having yet to see a Scottish Castle (or Isle for that matter), I set out in the Club's new BAE146, heading for London City Airport. (I promise myself I'll have it back before Bill's arrival as I'm sure he'll be needing it! Pict_02 ) I figured maybe I could stir up some dirt on this "Monk" fellow, he seems a little too neat, a little too clean to me....
Sunday, November 2:BANG - BANG - BANG! "Mr. Flounder?"As I stagger out of bed and pull on a light coat I notice that it's still dark out.POUND - POUND! "Mr. Flounder!" It is a woman's voice? Now that seems odd.I undo the 6 locks on the door and open it a crack, "WHAT?"There is a woman who appears to be of Far Eastern descent at my door."Mr. Flounder? Hi, my name is Salina Chan. I'm from the Flight Club International and I need you to come with me right away."A woman from the Flight Club? This is new! What is Tony trying to do now anyway? I have to ask, "Who sent you here?"She stammers, "Well, you did, sort of. You wanted information on the Flight of the Month right?""Ummm, Yeah.""Well, it's the second of the month and you haven't started flying yet. I have your route information from Tony and I was going to take you up to Cumbernauld so you could get started today.""Flight Info from Tony?" I ask. "What else did Tony give you?""An e-mail account?""Is he PAYING you to kidnap me?"She laughs loudly.
"Hey, you don't have to come you know! I just thought that since I had come to look you up AND since I had your route info you may want to join me." With that she turned to leave."Hey, wait!" I try to follow but the last chain is still attached to the door and I bang my head instead! "Wow" I think to myself, "This girl's got some spunk."I turn back to the room, throw my few things into a bag (it won't even zip shut) and run down the stairs to catch her in the lobby. "What was your name again?" I have to ask."Salina. Salina Chan" she responds. "Get in", she opens the car's driver's door."Ummmmmm, where are we going?""London City Airport, I have a plane waiting for us. Get in."I sit down before remembering that I'm in the UK and am actually in the PASSENGER'S seat now! She whisks us to the airport where there is a cute little twin-engine BizJet waiting.This Salina person takes the cockpit's left seat which is good 'cause I've never even heard of this plane before! We take to the skies shortly after dawn, and I'm without my Starbuck's Mocha. (Pict_03) Apparently in my haste to exit the States I missed the invitation and committee vote to accept Salina into our Vacant "Executive Board" Position. (They had a quorum vote without me, 6:1) So much for being in charge!Salina hands me a stack of papers and says, simply, "Here's the flight info you asked Alastair for." So, he HAD come through after all....It is a breezy and bumpy ride up in the EMB 170 (which Salina said something about Tony painting while the rest of us flew around Scotland????). We arrive into Cumbernauld (EGPG) at 8:25 AM, cool, scattered clouds, light rain.There is just one Shorts 360 waiting, and it isn't even in Flight Club Livery. "Salina?" I say, "Thanks.""Sure thing Flounder.""By the way, what are YOU flying?" I ask."Oh, don't worry about me, I can take care of myself."Well, there certainly wasn't much doubt about THAT!I climb into the ComAir Shorts and fire the engines, reviewing Tony's notes I set the ADF to 404 and request taxi at 9 AM. After departure I turn to 310° degrees but choose to only climb to 3,000 ft. (What's the point of touring a country if you have to be a mile up? Pict_04 ) Shortly after getting onto the 310° radial I see that the bumps and bruises were not from Miss Chan's driving but rather a brisk little southwestern breeze! I bump and bounce along until my ADF points to 270°, I turn to match that heading, flying over the airport at 1,500 ft. (Pict_05) Timed turns into a right-hand pattern to land on runway 20. As I come in, skirting the NEARBY hillside I see why Tony suggested landing on runway 02! Next time in I think I'll come OVER the hills and straight in. Landing is rough, right main first but on pavement and intact. It's 9:32 AM.One thing about these short hopper routes Tony has for us, it gives me the chance to fly totally by hand, no GPS, no autopilot just pure, fun flying. Great chance to work on that "technique", if you call it that. So, I take the chance to grab some breakfast, a famous Scotch Malt drink, and even sight-see for an hour. Then I drop off the Shorts and climb up into a snub-nosed Twotter at 12:30 PM. (Pict_06) I fly the recommended route until I am visual for runway 23 at Tiree. Clear skies but a bit windier here, solid landing right NEXT to the pavement!So now, I'm in Scotland....need to do something Scottish. So I climb into a plane I've featured before, the Scottish Twin Pioneer. Not exactly sure of this airframe's history but it is an older bird with some calm flight characteristics, I really like it! So I set off from Tiree with Nav1 (there's only one) set to 046° and ADF to 390. I follow the ADF right into some Real-World Thunderstorms. Moderate chop all around, not heavy wind but real choppy. Up - down- left- right, bump, bump! I fly over the ADF but see no airport. I turn back and fly over again, lightning getting closer...still no runway. I drop to 800 ft for my third pass, still no airfield? Maybe I should've downloaded that mesh! I fly a bit further northeast to find "Plockton" (I learned later) but that did not seem like the strip Tony had asked for and, with fuel running low, few if any facilities below and storms now buffeting me around, I headed off to Benbecula instead. (Picts_ 07 - 08 - 09 )The weather clears as I head back to the west and I finally land, very nicely I might add (I LOVE this little plane!) at 15:49.Tuesday, November 4th, 10 AM:Now that my route and my schedule is all messed up it looks like I'm on my own for a bit. Even up here in the far reaches of the Scottish highlands I can still get a taste of home...even here I can get 24-hour inspiration from http://www.plr.org/ . I have made some calls, checked in with some "contacts" I have and am now ready to take a British Airways Jetstream41 into Inverness. Weather today is, "wind up your kilt!" Surface wind to 32; at 6,000 ft it's up to 52 and at 9,000 ft it's up to 55! Scattered clouds and light rain. YIKES! I taxi out to runway 24 and take to the skies, I've set the Skye NDB as my mid-waypoint. (Picts_ 10 , 11 )I arrive in Inverness at 10:55 and tower advises me to park up next to "The Dash 8". Well, I can clearly see a sparkling new addition to the Flight Club hanger sitting there so I gladly park next to her. I see a yellow folder flapping around on a tether attached to the port-side prop. It's from my old friend and helpful buddy Alastair."Dear Cub Flounder,Sorry that we weren't able to join up ol' chap. I trust that you arrived safely this morning. (Great colors on that British Airways tail don't you think?) I know how you LOVE the Dash 8 and thought that you'd like to be the first to take her up.Cheerio, Alastair"What? Does he think I won't notice that SOMEONE had to fly the thing in from Central Oregon! Oh well, he comes through in the end, maybe not the kind of guy you want solving all your problems. Oh Hans, I have a job for you man! (Pict_12) Winds are calmer here and after some lunch and a quick look around, I head off on my last leg at 13:00. I'm not sure anymore what Tony was suggesting but I flew Inverness to KWL-VOR to SS-NDB to EGPW. I pick up a little escort shortly before my eventual arrival into Unst. (Pict_13) Come to find out there really weren't facilities enough for all of us so I landed alone and found a cozy room to spend a couple of days lounging about.Tony, I hope that we have helped your virtual tour of Scotland. Thanks for taking us someplace new. Thanks for the new planes! Oh, and thanks for the short, hand-flyable legs. I haven't had this much fun with a FOTM since October.
Ron
Ron
Post Script: I loved flying the Dash 8 so much that I turned around a couple of days later and hopped my way back to Inverness - including that missed stop in Plockton. Inverness is where I planned on spending the rest of the month...until I was sent off to Vienna on a "special" project which you'll read about in my December PIREP.
