April 2004 - Euro LoCo

Written for the Cub Flounder but flown by “Ivan Allen”
Pretendpilot: Having finally arrived safely back in Guadalupe after a month-long tour of Venezuela [Photo-001] , I called the Cub Flounder on cell phone. His arm was feeling much better, (He had been having his rehab done by a “specialist” in Nepal) his tan was significantly darker and he was about to head back to Oregon to attend to the family for a while. “But, what about the April flight?” I asked. “Well,” he replied, “back in December I took a guy named Ivan Allen to Greece. Last week I received an e-mail from him from Kiev, Ukraine - why don’t you see if he is up for flying this one? I’ll be back for the May flight,” he promised, “but for now I’d just as soon be at home getting the yard ready for spring.”
So I e-mailed Ivan and asked him to meet me in Frankfurt for the April flight. He was thrilled! After a search on FS.com I found a Pan American jet to take me non-stop from the Caribbean to Frankfurt. I departed at 5 AM and set up a GPS-direct route. I swept the wings and progressively climbed up to 53,000 ft and set cruise for MACH 1.5! This is a lot of fun to fly but because this plane is massive, the speed can be deceiving close to the ground, watch your rotation speed, which should be before 290 knots! [Photo-002] Arrival in Germany was uneventful although a bit long into 25R, and I parked up at 17:00 local time. [Photo-003] (That’s about 3 hours in the air, I think) This is where I met up with Ivan and exchanged information on April’s flight with him. Then I set my own sights on returning home at a bit more leisurely pace, via a non-stop Lufthansa A340.
Ivan Allen: First let me tell you that after that December flight to Samos, Greece I was able to convince my Editor-in-Chief to give me a 12-month sabbatical from work to “research” this hobby further. Since then I have been flying 8-10 hours per day, downloading like a madman and learning everything possible about the intricacies of this game. I hope that my 4 months’ of work pays off with a safe and successful flight for you all to enjoy this month.
Having met up with Pretend Pilot (another of Ron’s incarnations) in Frankfurt’s Main Airport, I settled in for some pastry and to go over the details of Salina’s FOTM suggestion – thanks for letting me fly along with you all.
I tore into the envelope only to discover that I’d be flying “irons” this month in little more than “commuter hops”. As I read deeper I found myself saying, “Please don’t screw this up, oh please, don’t screw up!” Apparently I was talking to myself louder than I realized because when I finally got to the line reading, (out loud) “…you will end up at the wrong airport…nearby city of Hahn…still called Frankfurt-Hahn…” I stood up to shout after the Pretend Pilot and was immediately tackled by two armed security officers. This was not starting out well!
I was not-so-politely escorted away to a small room where a senior officer questioned me and my paperwork. When I told him I was a reporter on assignment with TooMuchFS he peered over the top of his eyeglasses. “Vat do you know, about ze flyingk of Vorld Vor Two aihrcrafts over ze city ov London?” he asked.
“Well…” I stammered, “that was like, sixty years ago…I’m a bit too young to remember much of that.”
“NOT, in ze vor.” He stated, “lost month.”
“I know nothing about that.” I stated honestly. (Although I guess Hans and Alastair had threatened to do something like that)
Soon another man in a suit came into the room. “Zo, you know of ze man, Ernest Sarcasm?” he asked.
“I do not.” I stated.
“Vat about ze man, Bill Zmith?”
“Ahh yes, I met Bill in Greece last year, he was on the way to the hospital…something about his GI tract not feeling well?”
“AH HA! Zen you ARE part of ze troublezome group of ze flying cloob! Come vis uz! You kän't wäit tooh tell ze hoal schtorie!”
Actually, I thought I COULD wait but that German efficiency waits for no man!
Funny that neither the Cub Flounder nor Pretend Pilot had mentioned any of this to me! For two days I was questioned unmercifully: Battle of Britain or Battle of the Bulge? Bombing of Dresden or of Bremen? Sherman Tanks or Panzers? Chuck Yeager or Pappy Boington? Patton or Romel? Normandy or Bata’an? Midway or Coral Sea? Hiroshima or Nagasaki? Me109 or FW190? Airbus or Boeing? Hamburgers or Frankfurters? Bach or Beethoven? Streusel or Schnitzel? Pasta or Potatoes? Chilean Wine or Australian Wine? (Australia has wine? I thought only Oreg….) ROOS OR WALLABIES?
Well, after this ominous beginning I was taken back to Frankfurt’s Main airport despite my urging to go instead to Hahn. So now what? I decided to do what the “real” simmers do and go find myself some wings. Over the past two days I had been questioned about the Berlin Airlift, the MAAM B-25 Mitchell, an Me109 painted in “Peace Doves”(??) and an unauthorized flying Yellow Submarine, oh and the Starship Enterprise too….but, all that talk about old military aircraft made me wonder, what I could possibly find to fly over to Hahn. Finally, by mid-week some South American guy called “The Collector” had arranged a Ju87 Stuka for me to try out. I climbed up into the cockpit at 9:30 but it was all in German! I fiddled around for nearly 45 minutes before the thing coughed and sputtered to life. Then I realized I couldn’t see out! I finally found the brake lever and flaps, I taxied through and around the terminals and grassy infield before finally ending up out at runway 07L about 11:20 AM. I departed eastbound and immediately turned back to the west [Photo-004] . I never could find the radio so stayed below 2,000 ft in VFR airspace [Photo-005] . About an hour or so later I arrived in Hahn, (thanks to my new hand-held GPS unit) landing safely 3 times before the plane actually stayed on the ground. Once parked I was so shaken I collapsed to the ground sobbing!
Leg 1 = 14:20 Local Time, Frankfurt/Hahn, Germany: In a very well written article a few years back, http://www.flightsim.com/cgi/kds?$=main/feature/globe.htm the Pretend Pilot said that he preferred to fly Airbus’ rather than Boeings, so going off the inspiration of a former Flight Club pilot, Rik Vyverman, I ordered up a Thomas Cook A320 for this FOTM challenge. As soon as I learned that we’d be flying “irons” I had decided to fly BY HAND when under 10,000 ft. (Bill, watch carefully, and remember that compared to you, I’m a rookie!) I spent 20 minutes downloading real-weather and programming in my FMS waypoints. Finally at 14:42 I contacted ground for taxi clearance and then pushback. Pushback from the gate was spot-on, 14:45 as recommended and ground directed me to taxi this beautiful (Tony Radmilovich Repaint) aircraft out to runway 21 where I had to wait for two incoming flights. [Photo-006] I used FMS-routing to point my H.S.I. to the next waypoint and climbed out smoothly at 3,000 fpm, [Photo-007] keeping N1 under 80%. Once I had been cleared to make my left turn onto course I slowed climb to about 1,800 fpm and backed the engines down to 75% N1. [Photo-008] Once up through 10,000 ft I set autopilot for 290 knots and FL 250 for cruise. Weather was beautifully clear as we headed southeast across Germany and then the Austrian/Italian…..are they still considered the Alps here? [Photo-009] At this point I’m inclined to agree with Ron that these Airbus’ are great planes to fly and I was looking forward to several more flights aboard this A320!
For my approach to Tesseria ATC took me west for the ILS into runway 04R. There was some haze reportedly moving in but I felt confident as I scanned the horizon for landmarks. SUDDENLY, as I happened to be looking to my 11 o’clock I saw inbound traffic! I arrested my climb and turned slightly INTO him [Photo-010] . As he flashed past me, ATC called, “AAAAAAHHHHHH! Traaaaaaaaaffic alert, Aaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh…Cessna Caravan do you see that Airbus less then one mile?” Lord, have mercy on my soul!
A couple of vector and frequency changes later and I had my Heads-Up dialed in for the ILS, waiting for the haze that ATIS had reported. [Photo-011] While I couldn’t find that, I did find the wind was really shifty, one second ON, the next second gone. Therefore landing was not great, but we all survived without the luggage getting thrown about [ Photo-012 , right mains down with spoilers up!] and I parked up at the gate at 16:06.
Leg 2 = 17:00 Local Time, Venice, Italy: After dinner I expected to see my shiny yellow TC A320 waiting for me, but it was gone! Frantically I searched for my bird but she was well and truly GONE. I asked the local “Polizi” for assistance and was told that the aircraft had other flights to make and had just left for Munich. We looked over Salina’s notes and learned (only then) that she is recommending a different plane, different airline for each leg! What’s up with that?
So frantically I searched for a way to get to London, finally finding an old Alitalia 727. No FMS here boys and girls, so I sat down with the charts and calculated a VOR-hopping route to get us to Stanstead. Departure time then is 18:50 from runway 04L. [Photo-013] I was directed to a left turn toward my first VOR [Photo-014] and I have to tell you that I have NEVER HAD so much fun flying commercial! (The family was gone for a couple hours so I could actually fly for a change.) Once up to cruise (FL280) I set the HDG on autopilot but then had to manually dial in my radio frequencies. Then I adjusted the HDG to follow my arrows. Ahhhh, this was great! [Photo-015]
ATC brought me in over the city and set me up for approach from the southwest, into Stanstead. Light rain greeted me the last few hundred feet down and approach was maybe a bit flat [Photo-016] but landing was smooooooth and I shut down at the gates at 19:51.
Leg 3 = 10:25 Local Time, London/Stanstead, UK: A new day and a new positive attitude! Back out at Stanstead I find myself another great Airbus (Hmmmm, another Tony Radmilovich repaint?) I program in the FMS for High Altitude routes into Palma de Mallorca and push-back/departure is right on-time at 10:45. [Photo-017] Once again I am hand flying up through FL10k [Photo-018] (75% N1 up to cruise at FS 310) and other than a bit of light “chop” between 7-12,000 it is a clear and pleasant flight down over Germany and France. [Photo-019] ATC gives me a straight-in approach and hands me off to tower who confirms my position and intention. I’m coming in without the aide of ILS and everyone is happy until that final call they give you on about 4 mile final…she says, “cleared for the left pattern into 06L, number one for landing.” 06L? You’re kidding! Well, with no one requesting departure I throw the book out the window and continue my approach, again a bit on the flat side (what is it with that anyway?) I landed right ON the threshold line [Photo-020] but hey, that let me make an early turn-off and we parked up about 5 minutes ahead of schedule, 13:55.
Leg 4 = 22:50 Local Time, Palma de Mallorca: Who the heck leaves at 11 PM to get in at 1 AM? This is a bogus flight! So I’m into a Lufthansa A320 (flying over Germany, too bad it’s pitch black outside and you can’t see the plane but that’s what happens when you fly in THE MIDDLE OF THE FREAKING NIGHT!!) Departure is, on time…Arrival is, on time. I was so irritated by this flight that I took Flounder’s advice and tuned into the inspirational music at http://www.plr.org/ to relax for a while, that really helped.
Leg 5 = 7:15 Local Time, Cologne/Bonn, Germany: After just getting in at o’dark-thirty I certainly am NOT going to get up again 3 hours later for another flight, so I wait a day, maybe two before climbing into a true “Baby Airbus” the Air Europe A318 (isn’t this a hold-over from like FS98 or something? Really unimpressive these days!) [Photo-021] There is some light rain and very hard bumps climbing out to cruise altitude but the morning flight otherwise progresses along uneventfully and ATC brings me down (late as usual) for a straight-in eastbound arrival to Tegel. [Photos- 022 and 023 ] Approach is better this time…landing is a bit early? Gate arrival is on time, 08:15 as scheduled.
Leg 6 = 16:55 Local Time, Berlin/Tegel, Germany: Zo, after ze day in Behrleen ve are rheady for ze lost flight. You’ll finally get to see some Lufthansa livery over Germany as I pick out the BAE146 for this leg. (Bill, you’ll want to take note of your favorite plane!) Seems the real-world rain has picked up a bit, overcast ceilings at 1,500 ft, but I’m still looking forward to a generally pleasant flight just under 90 minutes. We close the stairs on time and ground directs me out to runway 08L and I advance the throttles at 17:03. I hand-fly up through the clag to FL220 [Photos- 024 and 025 ] and am aware, again, that these four powerful canister vacuums do not make a real fast airplane (75% N1 plants me firmly at 201 knots IAS). MAN! There is a ton of AI traffic today, ATC chatter is non-stop and even when I’m handed off it’s all I can do to squeeze in my confirmation! Down right hectic – and a whole lotta fun! Frankfurt turns me north of the airport for an approach into 07L’s ILS. [Photo-026] I got the nose WAY too high on flare and then, after I parked, [Photo 027] I forgot to go back and take an Instant Replay photo, but the two important things are that we survived another flight and I shut down at the gates on-time, 18:35.
So there it is, seems that we all survived despite a close mid-air call and some marginal landings. I am really thankful to Salina for this excellent FOTM and thankful to the Flight Club for again allowing me to join in your fun, this was really great!

March 2004 - Los Roques

Flown and reported by: “Pretend Pilot”
I had been standing there going over my daughter’s homework when the phone rang. It was the Cub Flounder, “Ron, Flounder here, I need a little bail-out,” he said. “I’ve been going crazy: Greece to South America to Japan to Australia…now I’m in Vegas and I’m beat! Could you cover the March FOTM for me?” I had recently returned from my own adventures but after a moment’s hesitation I accepted the challenge. I asked where I’d be going but that information hadn’t quite been released yet. So I agreed to meet up with “The Flounder” in Las Vegas.
This would be a great excuse to fly my favorite plane, the Dash 8, and check out this new download (I’m a late bloomer, what can I say?) from a Mr. Frolov. It was one of those overcast, blustery, rain-driven, miserable, typical late February mornings when I set out from KPDX on a VOR-hopping route to Klamath Falls, OR. Flight Time to K.Falls was 1:14. [Pict_01] From K.Kalls to Reno, NV in 0:51, [Picts_ 02 and 03 ] and then Reno on in to Vegas [Pict_04] in 1:28. I met up with “Flounder” in a French Bistro under the shadow of the Eiffel Tower (the Las Vegas one). He said that he really needed a “Get Away” and wondered if I’d be willing to shuttle him to St. Maarten/Princes Julianna in his own plane, the Flounder-One. He thought that it wouldn’t be too far out of the way for March’s flight, but I wondered how he knew that if he didn’t know where the March flight was? Oh, and one more thing, we’d have to wait to leave until after he attended tonight’s Rondo Veneziano Concert!
I waited impatiently at the terminal listening to http://www.plr.org/ until Flounder finally arrived, his left arm in a cast, nearly 2 hours after our pre-arranged time. “And…how was the concert?” I asked, nodding toward the cast. “Concert was great” he replied, but then continued, “…until a rabid fan was pushing toward a taxi outside the venue and knocked me into the street!” “So, what’s the damage?” I asked. “Nothing a little time on the beach watching planes land won’t fix." Shoot! Now I’m jealous, not of the fractured arm but of the time Flounder would have on this Caribbean vacation near Princes Julianna airport. So anyway, we departed westbound at 23:45 PM February 28th and arrived in St. Maarten in time for Sunday Brunch at the local resort. [Picts_ 05 and 06 ]
The Flounder and I met up again on Monday March first. He smiled as he handed me the briefing packet and said, “Just try not to insult Bill for a change, he really is a good guy.” With that he waved (his “good” arm) and turned towards the beach. I parked myself up under an umbrella, ordered my “virgin” drink and tore into the information from Alejandro. “A coral reef, some lagoons, snorkeling, ‘chasing fishes’, small rocky islands…etc” Man, there MUST be a way for me to get my real self to Venezuela!
But, on to business, here I was at St. Maarten with only an MD-11. After I finished my drink I made my way over to the local FBO. Some Internet searches and a phone call later and our good British “mate” Alastair had hooked me up with his Caribbean Twotter. A couple of days later I downloaded real-world weather and set off on an island-hopping tour! St. Maarten to St. Barthelemy to St. Kitts to Montserrat to Guadalupe to Dominica to Martinique to St. Lucia to St. Vincent to Grenada to Gran Roque. [Picts_ 07 - 08 - 09 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 ] Man! It’s near impossible to trim down those 50 great pictures!
Friday I flew “The Tour” from Alejandro using the Sopwith Camel from Gran Roque to Higuerote via Mosquises. Later that same day I took the Pacific Air Sea Otter (inspiration from Tony and his VA) Higuerote to Margarita via Cumana, landing in the water just off shore from the airport. [Picts_ 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 ]
After spending the weekend soaking up some much-needed sun, I was off in the Pacific Air Beech 1900 to spend the rest of the month hopping around Venezuela. (Anyone recognize any screenshots?) Finally, I latched myself to the Caraibes ERJ to head back up the Caribbean Islands. (Tough life but somebody has got to do it!) [Picts_ 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30 ]
Alejandro! You make me very hungry to visit your home! What a gorgeous flight and great FOTM. Thank you so much for such inspiration and another excuse to fly a tour around Venezuela – I am already looking forward to your next flight this coming winter

February 2004 - Grand Canyon Tour

Alastair, Alastair....? I think you are the only member of the Flight Club who doesn't ever fly in his own neighborhood! “…plenty of interest…in the western United States”?
Okay, well, before I get to February I want to be sure that everyone is caught up (truthfully) about all of the events of January. One great thing about this Flight of the Month Club is that it lets us have our “other” FS lives too. Not just FS, some of us have Real Lives and Jobs to distract us too! Anyway, at some point each month it seems that we are able to meet up at each destination, but we’ve never met up someplace at the same time. So in January we had our first-ever “Flight Club Fly-In.” Some of us had completed the January FOTM and others were on the way TO Japan but on Sunday January 18th we all met up in Perth, West Australia. More on that in just a bit but it was really great to see (almost) everyone together!
As for me, I had completed the January FOTM at Yakota AB in Tokyo and needed to find my way (back) to Australia. In his January FOTM Bill directed us to http://www.flightlookup.com/ and I must say, "WAY COOL, MAN!" So, from Yakota I took an S-3 Viking to Fukuoka [Pict. 01] , and then tried to look up some shorter flights which would get me into Perth. I wasn't ready to be told what planes to fly but I was curious about the routes and timing, and this would sort of mirror my own real world tour of the Far East. So here's what I did:
Fukuoka to Taipei like Cathay 511; only I'd fly the Flight Club's A320 [Pict. 02] . Taipei to Manila like EVA Air 271; only I'd fly my own repaint of the Default 737 called Paradise Air. Manila to Kai Tak like Cathay 900; only I'd fly the Cebu Pacific DC-9. (Happy now Tony? I kept it a little closer to home). [Picts 03 and 04 crossing the new HK airport on my way to a rather poor landing] Finally, Hong Kong to Perth, like Cathay 171 (a “red-eye” special); only I'd be flying a gorgeous reflective repaint of the Default Pacifica 777. [Picts 05 and 06 ]
I arrived in Perth a day early to scope out the scene in the Woodart Design's Dash 7 (Thanks for letting me borrow it Tony). The morning of the Fly-In I felt a bit uncomfortable…since we were flying in Bill’s homeyards I had asked him about “proper Perth behavior” and he had told me some rather strange things, but people in Perth may seem strange to an American, so I followed his directions. I left from Gingin (north of Perth) in said Dash 7. As I flew over Pearce Military AB I was joined by Salina (who at one point thought she was back in her Spitfire and tried to buzz my left wing off!). We flew over Jandakut were Peter and Bill joined us on the flight, and with live voice chat. Alastair and Tony joined us at Perth and then we were off to Rottnest Island. I was circling while Bill made an excellent landing and soon Salina joined him. After a marginal landing on my part I parked up near the others and climbed out of my Shorts (HA! the plane not my ACTUAL boxers). But see, here’s the problem; Bill had instructed me to wear boxer shorts with pink lip prints as well as that shiny white anti-sunburn stuff on my nose! Poor Salina was torn between laughter and nausea! Meantime, Alastair had arrived and our poor “proper Brit” was so shocked (or was that blinded by the WHITE – you see, it’s winter here and my legs haven’t seen the light of day since that Floatplane flight up to Victoria BC) that he struck his head on one of the props of my Dash 7, gashed open his scalp and was knocked unconscious!
Peter arrived and exclaimed, “Bloody hell Ron, put those things away!” So while I looked around for a place to hide, Salina revived Alastair. (Now, don’t jump to conclusions, she used the only thing she had, a 500 ml bottle of ice-cold Mango Nectar Juice). Soon enough Tony arrived and in typical fashion hobbled over to ask, “Hey, what’s going on?” [Picts 07 and 08 ]
Just then I heard the familiar tune of La Cucaracha playing. Instinctively I looked around for the Metallic Blue, Hydraulic-Suspensioned Chevy Impala but this was not the San Fernando Valley, it was Tony’s Cellular phone. “Whhhhhheblackey, Yellow?”
“Ahhhhh, Begrüßungen mein Freund. Warum sind Sie nicht hier mit uns? Mumbai?!?! What the ……. Oh no! Are you okay? Well, good luck then. Oh, no I’ll tell them, you don’t…..” (Tony really is a complex individual who has a much deeper intellect than one might expect – just goes to show that you can’t judge a book by it’s cover.)
Tony explained that Hans was on the way to the Fly-In but had some technical difficulties and a few crashes and was in hospital, unable to attend. Just then my own phone began ringing. It was Hans, explaining that he had been having some problems and would not be making the Fly-In. Well, at least he had made a good effort to get to Perth. Suddenly Peter’s phone began ringing. It was Hans, explaining that…..well, you get the idea. He proceeded to call each one of us to tell us that he wouldn’t be coming to the Fly-In. Meantime, Bill had powered up his plane and “left the session.” (I’m assuming that he felt guilty for giving me bad advice)
Those of us remaining continued on to Pearce Military where Alastair (I’m not yet sure if the slurred speech was from the head trauma or from the sticky Mango Nectar which now clung in long slimy strands from his matted beard), told us to head for “Lath Vegath and den tay tuned for direction on a Gand Canyon Tour” HUH? Over on the tarmac I saw my next flight waiting for me. So I excused myself (and my boxer shorts) from the Fly-In and took a LOOOONG flight from Perth, to Vandenburg AFB, which is just North of Santa Barbara, CA. [Picts 09 and 10 ]
(Even with using the great An225 I needed some virtual mid-air refueling and NO, Peter, I'm not able to actually DO THAT like you can. [See his Sept.'03 PIREP for details.]) I left in the late morning with 50% fuel and somewhere over the Solomon's I selected Aircraft > Fuel > 100%. With waypoints over the Solomons, Kiribati, Johnson Atoll, Hawaii and an approach from the north, I arrived in mid-afternoon. There was just enough time to catch a QUICK flight down to my old High School stomping grounds (See our Extra on the Side Flights); Vandenburg AFB, over the Channel Islands to Pt. Mugu NAS in the F-8 Crusader! [Picts 11 and 12 ]
After a week in the Ventura/Oxnard/Camarillo area I was nearly ready to move on when I received an e-mail from another one of our South American pilots, Brad. He wasn’t sure that he could make the flight as Alastair had laid out, via San Jose and all, so we worked out that I would meet him at Santa Monica after his flight up to LAX. So I arranged with my old Firefighting contacts in the southland to have their OV-10 Bronco delivered to Camarillo for me to pick-up. So, Camarillo, over my old High School, down the Malibu coastline following PCH (Too bad it was a really hazy/foggy morning; visibility was 3 miles up through 2,200 ft) [Pict. 13] in to Santa Monica, then up to Van Nuys (we noticed that the famous HOLLYWOOD sign is half-buried in the default texturing) and along the mountains, [Pict. 14] over Big Bear and Lake Arrowhead. Finally we turned south to land at the CDF “Ryan” air attack base in Hemet, CA. (Where there is a default scenery bug placing the runway about 15 feet below ground level)
At this point Brad and I were without wings. So I pulled some old strings at the CDF and we managed a ride to March AFB in the back of a Fire Con Crew van. After that little experience, Brad felt that he could take care of himself better than I. The last I saw of him he was climbing into a convertible Corvette with a young Hispanic beauty at the wheel (maybe he was right?)
When I was a youngster in Southern California, March AFB was a SAC Airbase housing many B-52 bombers. As for the fate of the airbase now…..we’ll have to ask Harlan or some of our other SoCal pilots about that, I’m not sure what they do with it now. But today, I strapped myself into the Flight Club’s F-86 Sabrejet [Pict. 15] and headed northeast, past Mt. San Gorgonio and on in to Las Vegas. [ Pict. 16 – Notice the speed brakes at the top of descent] That’d be Nellis AFB to be exact!
Leg Two: “Sightseeing”? Alastair, you must be crazy! If you had read Peter’s On the Side flight suggestion from way back last year (Called The Dam Challenge) you’d know that sightseeing is for wimps! So I began making arrangements with the Red Flag/Top Gun School at Nellis to borrow one of their aircraft. I was just ready to sign on the line, releasing the Sepecat Jaguar to me (I thought Alastair would appreciate that) when I was contacted by my old friend Alejandro who was having some problems of his own, due to the cold dryness of the Nevada desert. The freezing cold temps and humidity factors below 25% were causing some serious visual problems for our Venezuelan friend. Thus, he was having headaches, hand numbness and felt that he was unable to fly. We needed a TWO-SEATER; so they graciously re-assigned me into an “Aggressor” TA-4. “No problem” I assured Alejandro, “I’ll be happy for the company.” (I also read a report once from Bill Smith, which suggested that aerobatics could be used to cure sinus problems…) So, once Alejandro was safely strapped into the back seat, we headed south for the lead-in to Hoover Dam. “AIr, be sure your G-suit is plugged in!”
[Note, I was so caught up in the fact that I had a chance to fly two legs in one day AND the fact that I’d get to shoot some Class 4-5 rapids in the Skyhawk that I set out immediately from Nellis. Later, I discovered that it was nearly 4 PM local time, shadows were lengthening and I was still using real world weather. Framerates were running 12 fps for 5 secs then a 0.5 sec freeze, then 14 fps for 5 secs and another 0.5 secs freeze, then 9.7 fps for 5 secs and a freeze, 11.3 for 5 then a freeze ……I was also feeling a bit disappointed in the default texturing but more on that in the next paragraph. I know that Microsoft has tried to keep things computer and framerate friendly, and I know that there are MANY places in the world that “DESERVE” a little extra attention when it comes to default scenery (Victoria Falls in Africa for one?) but really guys, it seems that we could have gotten a LITTLE BIT better on the Grand Canyon!]
I noted recently that I was flying less then 4-5 fps at default airports so I certainly wasn’t going to try narrow canyons on my aging system with fps like that, (or less). Therefore, I may be the only one out there, but I flew this in default texturing. Two weeks after my first attempt I came back to set local time at 10:30 AM, cleared ALL weather, set temps to a balmy 30°F and took to the skies with Alejandro in the back seat of the “Aggressor”. We flew low over downtown and “The Strip” before continuing on to Boulder City, through that narrow canyon, up the dam, over Lake Mead, [Pict. 17] continuing up the Colorado River and through the Grand Canyon; bobbing and weaving sometimes [Pict. 18] between narrow canyon walls and sometimes hitting 3-4 Gs pulling up and over. I threw in a couple rolls and Cuban-8s just to keep AIr honest but in the end, even I was beginning to feel ill. I guess its no wonder Alejandro showered his cockpit with breakfast! But hey, at least we got his eyes watering again. Finally, mercifully, I was ready to land at Page Muni. [Pict. 19] and spend some quiet time listening live to the music on http://www.plr.org/, I even got to hear my Brother-in-Law this time!
A couple of days after my arrival in Page I was waiting for my next plane to arrive at the FBO when I heard a familiar, Australian voice on the radio, “G’Day Mites! Boron 5-5-9er is requesting visual to lond.” I watched the Flight Club’s Baron fly a textbook pattern and make a greased landing. I wasn’t sure if this was what I’d be flying out of here or not but WHO could make THAT kind of a landing in this wind? As the plane taxied to it’s parking area all I could make out was a big, giant hat inside! After shutting down, our own Bill Smith climbed out. He was wearing a too large black Stetson cowboy hat, a leather, cow-printed jacket with fleece collar; (think Flying Leathernecks meet Woody the Cowboy from Toy Story) tight fitted dark blue-jeans, alligator-skinned cowboy boots with shiny silver buckles and spurs. The antithesis of my own arrival in Perth we all had to clap and cheer as Bill swaggered up to the counter and in his best John Wayne imitation, ordered a drink!
Well, after a few days in the cool clear air of Northern Arizona I was ready to take my assignment and shuttle some sightseeing customers back to Vegas. Finally Hans had caught up to the rest of us and to make up for his absence in Japan he brought along a token of apology. Alastair had recommended something with a high-wing and good visibility; also something with reasonable speed. Well, Hans had done his homework and had gone into the old archives of FS.com to pull out a report of mine and delivered to me a Gandalf Do-328jet! I love this little plane, it kind of reminds me of a baby Orca. It is just a pleasure to fly and the return trip to Vegas was pure joy, a fine way to finish relaxing after a challenging, no, invigorating FOTM. [Picts 20 and 21 ]
Alastair, well done. Even if you DO think your own country is a bit bland, please feel free to continue providing these great flights for us!
One little aside note: About three days after completing this FOTM I was strolling down the sidewalk near the Luxor when I saw the same gorgeous young miss driving the same yellow Corvette down the strip. (Our Flightsim buddy Brad was nowhere to be seen) Brad, did you make it alive?

January 2004 - Japan Heavies

Sure, being the head of an International Organization has some perks, like recognition and fame....but it also kind of sucks because you are always "in charge." So, while the rest of the gang has had a nice vacation in Greece, I had some "business" to attend to in South America. So I departed Greece early in a 757 bound for the Canary Islands. Then into "Flounder-One" for a trip into Valencia, Venezuela. A couple other South American stops to take care of and, come New Year's, I found myself in Santiago, Chile. Now here comes the January FOTM for which Bill has sent us off to Japan!So I catch a LanChile A340 from Santiago (Pict_01) into FS Headquarters at NZFC (Pict_02) . A couple of days at "the office" before I catch a JAL 777 ( Pict_03 & Pict_04 ) to Haneda airport which was actually suggested as stop number two. (www.dangerous-airports.com has a nice tight IFR approach into here that is really fun in a "Heavy") But this time ATC brings me straight-in to the ILS for 34R and I park up at 17:09 local time.Can you believe that they use 747s for flights under two hours in Japan!?!?! I thought about taking a 747SP, in fact, the first time I crossed the Pacific (In Real Life) it was on an SP. Back then I thought that meant "Small and Puny." Since then I've grown to kinda like the plane. Just because this is Bill Smith's flight I wanted to do something a bit "outside the box", after all, he didn't even really try to complete my September FOTM! After some thought I finally settled on my new IL-96, after all, it's not a plane you'll see or hear from every other day is it? Maybe Tony needs to find a way to get Club Colors onto this Russian beauty! Tony???So I downloaded Real-World Weather and set a course Haneda to Osaka (Itami). I followed Bills suggestion and called up Ground at 6:57 AM ready for push back in coordination with JAL flight 341 which is a 747 in the real world. (Pict_05) I departed from 34R again and made a left turn to the first waypoint (Pict_06) . Shortly after reaching cruise altitude I could see Mt Fuji showing above the Real-World weather (Pict_07) . It was a brief flight for such a big plane, kinda fun actually....except that ATC brought me down WAY late and rather than a 30° right turn to incorrect the ILS I had to make an exaggerated left turn to loose a bit more altitude (like 9,000 ft worth of altitude). At this point the real world called me away for about an hour and I had the flight paused. When I returned I had the panel but all the outside (window) view had gone into power save mode and I couldn't get it to wake up. So I hand-flew the ILS into 32L with a BLACK screen. Pict_08 shows my landing long and left of center but down smoothly at 08:12 local time, perfect for shutting down at the gate as scheduled by 08:15! Amazing!So, now what? I'll need to find the "Castle", fly over a "large body of water" and land in Nagoya. It was 20°F and howling wind outside with snow flurries when I awoke my wife at 2:52 AM to announce that I had decided to fly the Mitsubishi Zero! A little Japanese history this month. Well, after waking her up to tell her THAT there wasn't much point in staying in bed so I got up and flew the next leg. ( Pict_09 , Pict_10 and Pict_11 ). Bill asked about the altitude of that "large body of water"....I'm getting about 123 feet.Now, I had thought that I'd fly this great IL-96 again for this leg but hey, why do that? I had a Nephew in the Air Force and for a year he was stationed at Yakota AFB just on the outskirts of Tokyo. So, I decided to fly with some old friends into Yakota (Pict_12) .Bill, commuter-hopping may not be the greatest challenge but hey, that's what I did LAST January so who can blame you for wanting to be like the Cub Flounder? It is always nice though to do some Real-World flights too (who knew that I could shut down "as scheduled"? - and I'd never flown into Nagoya so now I can check that one off my lifetime list. Thanks for a successful FOTM!
Ron Blehm

December 2003 - Samos Island, Greece

If there was one thing I looked forward to it was meeting this character they called "The Flounder." Did he look like a fish? Still, I was cautiously skeptical about the whole thing. From the moment my Senior Editor told me I had six weeks to write an article about Virtual Flight Simulation I had been skeptical.
First, I'm not that computer literate and second, I'm not an aircraft or flight aficionado. Still, an assignment is money so I started out where many modern-day writers do, on the Internet. My first stop was a sight called FlightSim.com. I was completely blown away by the shear size and volume of this sight, indeed of this hobby. In my career here I've covered the Northeastern Model Railroader’s Show, the "Baja"-California RC Challenge, the Golden Grannies’ Quilt-Off and Ma Kettle's Pumpkin Pie Trophy Bake in Northwestern Tennessee, but this was larger. This hobby covers the entire world, and there are hundreds-of-thousands who participate in one form or another. I had seen enough! A "virtual" hobby? A Website? Millions of "pilots" who were "out there"? I needed something tangible, something to hold in my hand (sometimes my wife says I'm too "concrete"). Another search along with a follow-up call to a local bookstore and I was holding a copy of PCPilot Magazine, published in the UK. I felt marginally better.
The magazine came with a CD-ROM (there's a shock from a "virtual hobby"). I found myself asking if nothing about this were real. Both on the CD and in one of the articles I found the name of a man in Oregon, "Tony", so I called. He not only was real, he immediately invited me to join him in Portland, promising to put me in touch with "The one who started this hair brained idea, ’The Cub Flounder'." Some days later I stood in the middle of Concourse C, on a crystal clear afternoon. We had landed in thick fog but by the time I deplaned and walked to the nearest bench it had cleared into a spectacular day.
Soon enough I met "Tony", a friendly middle-aged man with an eager smile. Obviously very intelligent, he immediately began talking about computers, Gigahertz, downloads, Megabytes and within 30 seconds I had decided that although I had NO CLUE what he was talking about, he was pretty harmless. I followed him out to his Ford Explorer, "A real Northwest car" he commented. Tony's conversation seemed to lull me into a sleepy state of semi-consciousness and before I knew what was happening he was giving me a tour of "Flounder One." He touted it as one of his newest creations and one that would likely be very popular with the other virtual pilots. This "Presidential" aircraft was bedecked in Mahogany wood with green and brass trim. Leather accents, a full-service kitchen, seating for 50.... "The baggage area can be converted by our wives for storage or additional living space (including a spot for the kids - AIr and Flounder will need that)." We departed Portland the same afternoon, destination unknown. As we climbed up through clear skies Tony began explaining to me about the "River-Six" something or other, VOR's, Waypoints and high-altitude jetways. I tried not to care but it was fascinating how this man knew so much about flying and navigating, yet he wasn't even a real pilot.
Then it struck me...HE WASN'T EVEN A REAL PILOT! "Do you golf?" he asked me. "Sure" I said. "But you’re no Tiger Woods!" "HA! Hardly that guy is...." "Why do you do it?" Tony fired back. I had to stammer. "To get away I guess. To get out a little bit." "You watch NASCAR?" was his next question. I said that Basketball was more my thing. "Why do you watch but not play in the NBA?" "Well because I am fascinated by the athleticism and the competition." "It's the same here you know?" He continued. "From my living room I can 'get away' to Europe for example. It's the challenge of navigating and landing and real-world weather and....." Suddenly I was lost in thought about all the places I had always wanted to go but have never had the chance. But still, skepticism reigned the day.
As the sun set behind us Tony took me outside the plane to look back over the scenes below! WOW, this really is spectacular, for a “game.” (See Photos 01 & 02 )
It is dark. I've dozed off. I can still here the rumble of the jet engines. Tony is nowhere around. I'm not sure if I'm dreaming or really flying. Was that a bit of turbulence? Fatigue, travel and too much information has blurred my mind as to what is real and what is not. I've never felt this way in ANY other hobby venue. "And that's the beauty isn't it?" Tony was standing behind me; he'd been watching me fondle the gauges on the cockpit. "For a moment there you forgot all about your laundry and your bills." Well, he was right. And now a deep concern for my own sanity washed over me.
"We'll be landing in Amsterdam shortly after sun-up." Tony told me "Weather is breezy, the few showers have moved on so should be a nice day. Flounder has an 11:42 AM scheduled departure to Vienna, so you can go with him from there."
A "Scheduled departure"? I thought this was all a fantasy. Are these guys nuts? Tony must have read my thoughts because his next question really hit home.
"When you shoot basketball, do you use a tennis ball on a 6 foot rim?" "Of course not!" was my answer. "Well," this taller man (once athletic?) continued, "we try, sometimes anyway, to fly LIKE the pros even though only few of us would claim to actually BE professionals." It was a good point. The model railroaders build their sets to look VERY real, only miniature. The model RC builders build their cars or trucks or planes to look real, only miniature. These guys take on their hobby trying to be real too, only they can't actually TOUCH anything they fly, and I still found that concerning. Maybe that's why they don't get the press some of these other groups do...maybe you have to have a certain amount of ethereal intelligence to be a "Flight Simmer."
As Tony sets up for landing I have no idea what he's doing but he is busy over there and appears to be concentrating as well. For him, those cows out back in the garden are a pretty distant thought right now. This is escapism at it's best, and there's no mess to clean up, no room or garage dedicated to your hobby, not like guys who rebuild cars (which seldom ever run anyway). Suddenly I see runways ahead and other planes in the air. There is conversation from planes and pilots and airport and..... how does he do it all? I guess THIS is the attraction, for guys who like planes and flying. The landing is smooth and Tony tries to explain what is going on but as usual, I'm lost. Maybe this "Flounder" will speak English.
"The Flounder" is another real man, named Ron. Oddly, he's also from Oregon (conspiracy theories quickly cross my mind). He's shorter than Tony but much more athletic! Younger too I suppose (I'd say 20 years younger looking but I know that Tony is only in his late 40's). Ron has arrived in a twin-engine business-class jet that looks like it's designed after a full-sized airliner. He seems not to notice me until we are halfway through the tour of "Flounder One", the jumbo I came over on and his new, personal plane.
Pleasantries exchanged I have determined already that this Ron guy may not have the technical expertise of Tony but I find him more captivating. Later I will ask him about his enthusiasm and he'll laugh. "No," he'll reply, "Wait until you meet Bill Smith. This guy sleeps with his hard drive under his pillow.... actually, I'm not sure if he uses a pillow, maybe he just sleeps on his keyboard, which could explain where his hair has gone - wore it right off his head." Now I am intrigued.
Ron will go on talking about "Kirk" who pursues his hobby while at work (away from wife and kids) and "AIr" for that matter who works LATE in order to have some flight time and a faster internet. "Skygirl" who has no real friends and "The Monk" who (worships) his private plane collection. Not wanting to leave out "The Wizard" he promised I'd meet them all later.
Back to the story. Ron and I walk over, there I go, we VIRTUALLY walk over to an older looking plane, which he calls the "DC-4". A World War II-era design which saw military and commercial service the world over. "In fact," he continues, "since we'll be flying over Germany I can tell you about the Berlin Airlift on the way. DC-4's were a BIG PART of that Operation." Now, I can honestly say that I have not had a good history lesson while researching any of my other stories.
Ron goes through some real mental and keyboard gymnastics to get the engines to start, they grumble and groan just like a real plane - and unlike any RC plane I've ever seen! He explains that many of the steps are the same one's a real DC-4 pilot would do, "only he has REAL knobs to turn." At least this guy can admit that.
We bump and grind out to runway 06 and depart to the Northeast. Ron allows me to look back over the main airport as we climb away and I can see that this is one of the busiest places imaginable with airlines from all over Europe and the world docked up or taxiing about. Ron explains how we will use only "non-directional radio beacons" to guide us across Germany. He shows me the arrow, much like a compass, which points to the next radio tower, some miles ahead. Once we cross that he tunes a new channel (just like in your car) and the arrow moves to show us a new heading to fly. We "trim-out" at 7,000 ft and spend the better part of two hours crossing the green fields and rolling hills of central and southern Germany. (See Photo 03)
As we approach Vienna Ron explains very clearing about the radio beacon at the end of some runways, "like a non-rotating lighthouse" he says. He tunes the radio to pick up this "beacon of light" and shows how the needles tell him if he is left, right, above or below the beam. "Then we just drive down, right onto the runway,” he says. But I could clearly see that out the window. "Better to know what to do before you need to do it." he responds. And I find myself thinking that nowhere else can I get this kind of an up-close experience to flying a DC-4...and after 9/11/01 I likely won't get too near any other cockpits either!
"Now what?" I have to ask. "Now," Ron replies, a twinkle in his eye, "we see a little of Vienna." He leads me over to the FujiFilm blimp! I've always wanted to ride in a blimp - now this was providing me some cheap thrills! There are scattered showers around the city as we take to the sky. This is some of the most fun I've had researching a story EVER. The views from inside and outside the Blimp are amazing. We fly over to a soccer stadium but there is a game going on and “Flounder,” suggests that 65,000 fans might not like our visit. We find a small park right in the middle of town and we proceed to set down, to LAND THE BLIMP, right in the middle of the neighborhood! This is incredible!! We tie up to some trees and run over about 2 blocks to a shop that sells Lederhosen, “Bill wanted these” Ron says. (See Photos 04 - 05 - 06 )
Back to the blimp we take off, nearly shearing some roofs along the way, and return to the airport where a new surprise awaits. A two-seater, fighter from the Vietnam era, the big and powerful F-4 Phantom. I cannot believe what I have seen here, business jets, jumbos, old piston-engine transports, blimps, and now fighters! What can these guys NOT fly? I had a neighbor who rebuilt cars, only Chevy’s, nothing else. “Oh, some guys are like that, ‘The Monk’ is an example, he has, probably, 500 private or General Aviation planes in his collection. Getting him to fly something like this might actually kill him off!”
We depart Vienna and OH MY GOSH, STRAIGHT UP. (See Photo 07) “YEEEEEHAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!” As we climb up to 17,000 ft the weather clears and we get some spectacular views of this amazing country. (See Photo 08) Then, barely 45 minutes later we are heading down, waaaaaay down, into an alpine valley. To me, it feels like we are doing 700 miles an hour. WHAT A RUSH! I never felt THIS watching grannies quilt! Finally I see the village, the hamlet of Innsbruck laying in the valley ahead. The Flounder puts up the spoilers, lowers the flaps and landing gear and gets blown off coarse a bit. (I had to say that so that you all wouldn't think he was perfect). But with some tricky play on the throttles he corrects in time to make a rough landing on the runway. The rest of the day is spent reviewing Olympic memories and collecting souvenirs.
http://www.geocities.com/mollyjoyful/austria.html http://www.kiat.net/olympics/history/winter/w09innsbruck.html http://www.pinlink.com/Merchant2/merchant.mv?Screen=CTGY&Store_Code=P&Category_Code=I
While here, Ron also introduces me to his Brother-in-Law, via this link: http://www.plr.org/ Actually, when an American is in Austria, he tends to forget about Thanksgiving back home. Suddenly that last Thursday of the month has come and gone and Flounder is dragging me back out to the airport. I didn't want to go but somehow I knew I had a job to do, and The Flounder promised better things to come. We boarded an Air-Berlin 737 (nice winglets) with a rather robust load of Austrian Vacationers and I watched Ron taxi back out to runway 08. The weather had cleared and I actually looked forward to a beautiful flight.
Up in the Cockpit Ron showed how we would track a route back over Vienna, over Budapest, Belgrade, Kopje, and Thessoloniki before landing at one of the Greek Isles. Another place I've longed to visit, GREECE. (And home of the next summer Olympic Games by the way) This job was turning out to be more fun than I had ever dreamed! I'm afraid I've become hooked on this. As stated, I'm not much of a computer or airplane kind of a guy but the challenge of navigating, the thrill of seeing the world, the knowledge gained for my next real-world flight.... I could do this, if only just once a month or so!
We depart up the same valley we had rocketed down in the Phantom. Ron skillfully shows me how we follow the "tails" on the navigation dial to avoid "driving into the mountains." (See Photo 9) We climb up to cruise level at 35,000 ft. I watch intently as clouds build below, obscuring views of the former Yugoslav Republics. (See Photo 10) By the time we cross Greece and head out over the Mediterranean however it has cleared again. "The Flounder" asks me to dial up the navigation radio for Samos, Greece which by now I can do. We watch the numbers count down and by 110 miles out Ron has slowed the plane and we are descending over the isles. Green, Brown and Rocky but surrounded by Azure Seas! This is amazing - have I already said that?
We fly directly over the island and I'd have to say that the runway didn't look very big. Ron explains that this is traditionally quite the tricky approach. Once down to 3,000 ft (just nine miles from the airport now) we make a big turn and head back directly for the island. Ron keeps looking out the Right-side window to get a fix on the airport. We continue to slow and descend as Ron drops in flaps and landing gear. (See Photo 11) It looks to me like we are flying directly toward the mountains but Ron keeps looking over to the airport. (See Photo 12) I'm no pilot but it seems to me that this is a very awkward angle! Finally, just before we slam into the rocks and trees Ron lays the plane over onto its right side! I can feel the engines surge. (See Photos 13 - 14 - 15 ) We roll out of the turn heading right for the end of the runway.
"Too Fast, too fast!" Ron keeps saying. He pulls the throttles back and raises the nose of the plane. (See Photo 16) I can still see the runway ahead; it looks fine to me.... Ron deploys the spoilers, early according to him, and the plane settles smoothly onto the runway. (See Photos 17 & 18 ) Braking and reverse thrusters engaged and we pull up easily before the end of the runway. It is a few minutes after 2 PM. "Welcome to Greece!" (See Photo 19)
Here, on this arid resort in the middle of the Mediterranean I have the honor to meet the other pilots in this "Flight Club" which Tony has set me up with. I cannot tell you the contentment I felt sitting on the rocky beach, Mediterranean Sea lapping at my toes, sipping the Australian Wine which "The Wizard" had flown in, listening to these friends talk of their flight adventures. It is almost like they had BEEN THERE. I felt like I had been there, how much more for them? Truly, I'm going to have to try this as soon as I get home.
And speaking of home. Now that we are at the end of my part of the assignment Ron agrees to fly me out of Greece (as far as Athens anyway). We borrow Alejandro's King Air 200 and fly into Mykonos for a brief look around and then on to Athens. (See Photos 20 - 21 - 22 ) That is where I leave these newfound friends and head back to my own little corner of the world. But now I knew that I wasn't doomed to stay in my own little corner, I could travel, if only virtually, anywhere I wanted.
Thank you to F.S Flight Club International for hosting my tour. A special thanks to "Tony" for setting me up with this wonderful group, thanks to "The Flounder" for so expertly showing me the world and to "Kirk" for this awesome destination in the Greek Isles! I will end by promising my new virtual friends that you will hear from me again, in the skies over some distant land.
To find out more about this virtual flight club visit http://www.toomuchfs.com/ To find out more about Flight Simulation in general visit http://www.flightsim.com/ To find out more about PCPilot magazine visit http://www.pcpilot.net/ To find out more about Positive Life Radio visit http://www.plr.org/
Ron Blehm cubflounder@toomuchfs.com

November 2003 - Wee Bit O' Scotland

Friday, October 24th, 2003 at the Ashley House on the Otter Banks of North Carolina ( http://www.outer-banks.com/ashley/ )You see a group of six guys sitting around the dinner table talking, laughing and drinking, old friends you assume. You'd be right.These guys have been living here for the better part of a month and the house looks like it's had some mileage put on it. One of the men, a Brit, gets up from the table often to go put something away. You think he's just a BIT more fastidious then the others. You'd be correct in that assumption as well. A big topic of discussion in the group is the fact that they need to add another Executive Member to their ranks, to fill a vacancy.You also notice that one of the men seems to be drinking a bit more than the others. Not that be brags about how much he can drink but there does seem to be some debate about WHO'S drinks are the best. Suddenly this man stands to his feet, "Well Laddies," he blubbers, "you're gonna need your Shetland sweaters and maybe a little rain gear next month. And I ain't giving you any more runway than you absolutely need!"The others exchange concerned glances. Finally one of the men asks, "You mean Scotland?""Sure!" Bellows the first man.The Venezuelan man speaks next, "Scotland. You mean that area over by....""You know," interrupts the first man, still standing, "That place north of England full of raucous types whom Emperor Hadrian spent most of his retirement fund on trying to keep out of England.""Are you sure you want to do that?" the Englishman calls out from in the kitchen."Simple" says the first man again, "two plus two equals Loch Ness and wind up your kilt." He ends with a devious laugh before sitting back down.Probably the smallest man speaks next. "Tony, back in March you promised us warmer weather.""Yeah" chimes in the Venezuelan, "I'm used to living where it's sunny or at least warm every day. We have more Miss Universe winner than every other country!""Awe" Tony sighs, "You're all weather wimps!""Sure Mite," another joins in, "We leeve in temprate climes. It's known to most of the world as COMFORT!"You think to yourself that maybe this is all a big joke. That this first man is taunting his friends with stories of Scotland only to find that once he sobers up he'll be inviting them to Hawaii. (You make a mental note to yourself that this might be kinda funny to do sometime)The two Aussies and the Venezuelan start arguing with the Brit and the guy named Tony about who's weather is best. The smaller man gets up and leaves the table in silence. You follow him into another room where, by the fireplace, there is a seventh man, a big bearded guy who at first looks to be asleep, but then you notice that he's working on his laptop. He's looking up Greek Vacation Destinations - looking forward to December I guess, Christmas on the Mediterranean?

Saturday morning I slip out of the house after breakfast, the others are still fast asleep (well, except for the Englishman who has scheduled a tour aboard one of the Club's aircraft.) The two men make their way to the Kill Devil Hills Airport where there are half a dozen planes waiting. Ron climbs into the Piper Meridian while Alastair situates himself in the Flight Club's PC-12. Before long they are winging their way north into Baltimore, Maryland. (Pict_01) After we landed (not easy in this wind) I'm not sure what happened to Alastair. I made my way over to a British Airways L-1011 (old livery) and just an hour later I was roaring down the runway toward V2! It was an overcast but uneventful day "crossing the pond" and I arrived in Glasgow, Scotland after 9:30 PM, surprisingly clear.Off to bed in a local hotel for the night with some sightseeing planned for the next week. But I awoke in a panic! "So here I am in Glasgow, but Tony will release the actual flight details back in North Carolina!" Quickly I call Alastair - always one to help out! "Alastair! I've messed up and need your help, man." I shout into the phone. He reminds me that it's only 1 o'clock AM on the east coast and he has only been sleeping for two hours...."Oh, sorry," I whisper. "Alastair, I'm here in Scotland but I need you to fax me the FOTM details - I forgot that I don't have them yet."He laughs. "And you think I do?" he asks. "Tony has given us nothing else" he continues, "I'll bring the info over with me when I come"."Great, where shall we met up?" I ask."Flounder...." Alastair sighs, "Could be Glasgow or Edinburgh or any airport with an ILS able to handle the bigger planes. I'll be the 'Proper British Gent', driving a little green MG and wearing a plaid scarf." He tells me."Alastair, that's no...." but my comment is met with a CLICK from the other end of the line. Guess I'll just keep checking my e-mail.That was a huge mistake! Miss....we call her "Money Penny", back at NZFC had forwarded a number of messages to me concerning Club Activities that I had to attend to:

A fine for an unauthorized fly-over in Vancouver, WA from January

Another fine for landing in conditions that did not meet minimums, also from January

About two dozen bills from some paint supply store in Central Oregon

A custodial fee from a resort in Baffin Island Canada, something about "Dung Removal"???

About five bills for aircraft parts and accessories from Alaska (More than half involved nose wheels?). These were clipped to about 20 more bills from France!

Two warnings from the German Air Authorities about non-traditional aircraft....Another fine for flying too low in the Alps, something about an A-6?

A citation about unapproved night landings in New Zealand as well as a note from some irate passenger about the poor service he'd received on another NZ flight?

A note from the FBI about some guy named "Ernest".

A bill from the "Venezuelan Tourism Board" claiming that we took away business from them by "advertising" their beautiful country on the internet!

Two Police reports about stolen Military jets from Hawaii.....Where do these guys come up with all this stuff!?!?!!? It's all hogwash.

Near the bottom of the stack was yet another bill for 60,000 lbs of Jet-A from Denver, CO? We haven't even flown to Denver! "CANCEL - RETURN TO SENDER - REFUSED!" I spent a week of my "vacation" playing political spin-master trying to get rid off this pile of garbage Miss Penny had sent. I swear what this Club needs is a person who seems really nice and willing to help but who, in reality does nothing to solve your.....ALASTAIR! He's perfect for the job - just like the flight plan I have YET to receive!Having yet to see a Scottish Castle (or Isle for that matter), I set out in the Club's new BAE146, heading for London City Airport. (I promise myself I'll have it back before Bill's arrival as I'm sure he'll be needing it! Pict_02 ) I figured maybe I could stir up some dirt on this "Monk" fellow, he seems a little too neat, a little too clean to me....

Sunday, November 2:BANG - BANG - BANG! "Mr. Flounder?"As I stagger out of bed and pull on a light coat I notice that it's still dark out.POUND - POUND! "Mr. Flounder!" It is a woman's voice? Now that seems odd.I undo the 6 locks on the door and open it a crack, "WHAT?"There is a woman who appears to be of Far Eastern descent at my door."Mr. Flounder? Hi, my name is Salina Chan. I'm from the Flight Club International and I need you to come with me right away."A woman from the Flight Club? This is new! What is Tony trying to do now anyway? I have to ask, "Who sent you here?"She stammers, "Well, you did, sort of. You wanted information on the Flight of the Month right?""Ummm, Yeah.""Well, it's the second of the month and you haven't started flying yet. I have your route information from Tony and I was going to take you up to Cumbernauld so you could get started today.""Flight Info from Tony?" I ask. "What else did Tony give you?""An e-mail account?""Is he PAYING you to kidnap me?"She laughs loudly.

"Hey, you don't have to come you know! I just thought that since I had come to look you up AND since I had your route info you may want to join me." With that she turned to leave."Hey, wait!" I try to follow but the last chain is still attached to the door and I bang my head instead! "Wow" I think to myself, "This girl's got some spunk."I turn back to the room, throw my few things into a bag (it won't even zip shut) and run down the stairs to catch her in the lobby. "What was your name again?" I have to ask."Salina. Salina Chan" she responds. "Get in", she opens the car's driver's door."Ummmmmm, where are we going?""London City Airport, I have a plane waiting for us. Get in."I sit down before remembering that I'm in the UK and am actually in the PASSENGER'S seat now! She whisks us to the airport where there is a cute little twin-engine BizJet waiting.This Salina person takes the cockpit's left seat which is good 'cause I've never even heard of this plane before! We take to the skies shortly after dawn, and I'm without my Starbuck's Mocha. (Pict_03) Apparently in my haste to exit the States I missed the invitation and committee vote to accept Salina into our Vacant "Executive Board" Position. (They had a quorum vote without me, 6:1) So much for being in charge!Salina hands me a stack of papers and says, simply, "Here's the flight info you asked Alastair for." So, he HAD come through after all....It is a breezy and bumpy ride up in the EMB 170 (which Salina said something about Tony painting while the rest of us flew around Scotland????). We arrive into Cumbernauld (EGPG) at 8:25 AM, cool, scattered clouds, light rain.There is just one Shorts 360 waiting, and it isn't even in Flight Club Livery. "Salina?" I say, "Thanks.""Sure thing Flounder.""By the way, what are YOU flying?" I ask."Oh, don't worry about me, I can take care of myself."Well, there certainly wasn't much doubt about THAT!I climb into the ComAir Shorts and fire the engines, reviewing Tony's notes I set the ADF to 404 and request taxi at 9 AM. After departure I turn to 310° degrees but choose to only climb to 3,000 ft. (What's the point of touring a country if you have to be a mile up? Pict_04 ) Shortly after getting onto the 310° radial I see that the bumps and bruises were not from Miss Chan's driving but rather a brisk little southwestern breeze! I bump and bounce along until my ADF points to 270°, I turn to match that heading, flying over the airport at 1,500 ft. (Pict_05) Timed turns into a right-hand pattern to land on runway 20. As I come in, skirting the NEARBY hillside I see why Tony suggested landing on runway 02! Next time in I think I'll come OVER the hills and straight in. Landing is rough, right main first but on pavement and intact. It's 9:32 AM.One thing about these short hopper routes Tony has for us, it gives me the chance to fly totally by hand, no GPS, no autopilot just pure, fun flying. Great chance to work on that "technique", if you call it that. So, I take the chance to grab some breakfast, a famous Scotch Malt drink, and even sight-see for an hour. Then I drop off the Shorts and climb up into a snub-nosed Twotter at 12:30 PM. (Pict_06) I fly the recommended route until I am visual for runway 23 at Tiree. Clear skies but a bit windier here, solid landing right NEXT to the pavement!So now, I'm in Scotland....need to do something Scottish. So I climb into a plane I've featured before, the Scottish Twin Pioneer. Not exactly sure of this airframe's history but it is an older bird with some calm flight characteristics, I really like it! So I set off from Tiree with Nav1 (there's only one) set to 046° and ADF to 390. I follow the ADF right into some Real-World Thunderstorms. Moderate chop all around, not heavy wind but real choppy. Up - down- left- right, bump, bump! I fly over the ADF but see no airport. I turn back and fly over again, lightning getting closer...still no runway. I drop to 800 ft for my third pass, still no airfield? Maybe I should've downloaded that mesh! I fly a bit further northeast to find "Plockton" (I learned later) but that did not seem like the strip Tony had asked for and, with fuel running low, few if any facilities below and storms now buffeting me around, I headed off to Benbecula instead. (Picts_ 07 - 08 - 09 )The weather clears as I head back to the west and I finally land, very nicely I might add (I LOVE this little plane!) at 15:49.Tuesday, November 4th, 10 AM:Now that my route and my schedule is all messed up it looks like I'm on my own for a bit. Even up here in the far reaches of the Scottish highlands I can still get a taste of home...even here I can get 24-hour inspiration from http://www.plr.org/ . I have made some calls, checked in with some "contacts" I have and am now ready to take a British Airways Jetstream41 into Inverness. Weather today is, "wind up your kilt!" Surface wind to 32; at 6,000 ft it's up to 52 and at 9,000 ft it's up to 55! Scattered clouds and light rain. YIKES! I taxi out to runway 24 and take to the skies, I've set the Skye NDB as my mid-waypoint. (Picts_ 10 , 11 )I arrive in Inverness at 10:55 and tower advises me to park up next to "The Dash 8". Well, I can clearly see a sparkling new addition to the Flight Club hanger sitting there so I gladly park next to her. I see a yellow folder flapping around on a tether attached to the port-side prop. It's from my old friend and helpful buddy Alastair."Dear Cub Flounder,Sorry that we weren't able to join up ol' chap. I trust that you arrived safely this morning. (Great colors on that British Airways tail don't you think?) I know how you LOVE the Dash 8 and thought that you'd like to be the first to take her up.Cheerio, Alastair"What? Does he think I won't notice that SOMEONE had to fly the thing in from Central Oregon! Oh well, he comes through in the end, maybe not the kind of guy you want solving all your problems. Oh Hans, I have a job for you man! (Pict_12) Winds are calmer here and after some lunch and a quick look around, I head off on my last leg at 13:00. I'm not sure anymore what Tony was suggesting but I flew Inverness to KWL-VOR to SS-NDB to EGPW. I pick up a little escort shortly before my eventual arrival into Unst. (Pict_13) Come to find out there really weren't facilities enough for all of us so I landed alone and found a cozy room to spend a couple of days lounging about.Tony, I hope that we have helped your virtual tour of Scotland. Thanks for taking us someplace new. Thanks for the new planes! Oh, and thanks for the short, hand-flyable legs. I haven't had this much fun with a FOTM since October.
Ron

Post Script: I loved flying the Dash 8 so much that I turned around a couple of days later and hopped my way back to Inverness - including that missed stop in Plockton. Inverness is where I planned on spending the rest of the month...until I was sent off to Vienna on a "special" project which you'll read about in my December PIREP.

October 2003 - What is your classic?

PROLOGUE- Voice: "Ron?"Voice: "RON, are you okay?"Me: MOAN~~Voice: "Flounder! Open you eyes, man!"Me: BRIGHT~Voice: "Flounder, it's the doctor. You're okay. It's over now, you can wake up."Me: "What day is it?"Doctor: "It's Wednesday, October 1st, 2003. Almost noon."Me: "2003?" 100 years. "Are you sure?"Doctor: "Sure I'm sure. You've had quite the trip this week! You rest and the Captain will see you in a bit."Me: "Captain? Where.....?" I drift back to sleep.
DREAM-The weather was garbage! Visibility was nothing, winds were heavy and gusting, rain had been pelting down for what seemed like hours. The airspeed indicator was dancing all over, the wings rocked but not in a gentle fashion. "How am I EVER going to land this thing?" I found myself asking. (pict_01) There was no response of course, I was alone. All I knew was that I had a mission to accomplish and it HAD to be done. I also had some strange memory of a guy named Bill Smith who had been ill...was on medication...was trying to fly while in a stupor...crashed...was in hospital...see his May PIREP. (This was nothing like that of course!)
THE FOG-It was actually September, 2003 but I was flying the October FOTM by Peter Stark which hadn't even been released yet! Was there something about a Star Trek Transporter and a shift in the Time-Space Continuum? I really can't remember the details but that WOULD explain some of the good doctor's comments.Actually, some weeks beforehand I had been able to log on and download Real-World Weather as Hurricane Isabelle was making landfall!Here's what I knew at that moment:
It was September 2003 but I was flying the October FOTM.
Seems that SOMEONE could have asked us to celebrate 100 years of aviation sooner. Was that Alastair's attempt in August with his "Classic Floatplane Tour of the Hawaiian Islands"?
I heard music...coming from the computer...from http://www.plr.org/
My last memory from the Flight Club was in sunny and warm Victoria, British Columbia...it was the 1930's, foggy and I was about....no wait, that was Casablanca in the 1930's and it was SHE getting onto the plane...no, wait! Victoria was her name, maybe...it was early morning, 6:55, and she and I were BOTH leaving Casablanca....well, I tried but no, it WAS Victoria, BC and I was the one leaving, ALONE! (Take note, no strange women in my stories) THE STORY- I fired up the engines of this old classic and ATC directed me out to the end of runway 27 for departure. (pict_02) After the westbound departure and clean-up I turned right, flew back over the airport and headed east. Into the future which rose before me like the rising sun!The Douglas DC-3 or C-47 or Gooney Bird or whichever other version you want to call it is, quite simply, the anchor of any "Classic Plane" list you want me to make. Sure, there were others before but this one has lasted! This aircraft has seen service, both commercial and military, the world over. It has been flown in some of the least hospitable conditions imaginable and has proven itself time and again to be a trustworthy "workhorse". That some of these great planes survive today is a testament not only to groups like MAAM but also to the original design teams and manufacturers. So, the first plane up in this FOTM is the FS Flight Club's venerable DC-3, which I landed in Billings, Montana at 11:40 AM.I don't even remember parking or looking around or anything like that. Suddenly, as though squeezed through a compressive time warp, I found myself dancing on the rudder pedals of a seriously powerful machine. The P-51 was rocketing down the runway! I was fearful of loosing control so I eased back on the stick but kept the plane low (pict_03) . Once cleared of airport property I began my climbing turn back to the east. Was I heading off on some great escort mission over Europe? Certainly I was heading in the right direction, but I wasn't coming upon any water. I had, frankly, little idea where I was going and there was no GPS in 1944!I hesitate to say that the P-51 marked a turning point for the Allied Forces in World War 2...but having a fighter with the speed and range capabilities found in the Mustang proved to be a great benefit for those big, vulnerable bombers as they made their relentless if not precise bombing raids. The Mustang saw service in both theatres of World War II and was even a hold-out into the jet age of the Korean and Vietnam conflicts! The design and airframe survives today in demonstration and racing versions...making the P-51 Mustang my number two choice, a "Classic Fighter."Since I seem to be moving forward in time now, I can only assume that my next plane will be an F-4 Phantom! Anticipation eats away at me as I bring the Mustang in for a fast but (Peter, note this) SMOOTH landing."Flog Shrimp Nine Six Clarence Dunaway Meatloaf."WHAT?"Flag Ship One-Niner-Six-Niner, you are cleared for IFR departure on runway 3-2."It was the Tower at Rapid City, South Dakota, clearing my airliner for takeoff. The panel indicates a "three-holer" with plenty of gas. The time was 12:53 but I had no idea of the date. Oh, what a headache I had! Where WAS I going?"Flag Ship One-Niner-Six-Niner, confirm last transmission."See what too much flying gets you? "Ummmm, right, errrr, ROGER, uhhhhh, One-Six-Niner-something cleared for takeoff. Thanks. ummmm, have a good flight...I mean day, have a good day. I'LL be flying now, not you, Roger. Ummmm, where are the throttles on this....Sir? What am I flying agin?""Flag Ship One-Niner-Six-Niner, your Boeing 727 is cleared for IMMEDIATE departure from runway 3-2." (pict_04) Third up on my list then is the 727 which entered commercial service in the 1960's sometime. In fact, this is the first commercial plane I ever remember flying on. I was about 5 years old when we took a Springtime trip to Alaska! Some 30 years later this plane was only recently retired from front-line service here in the U.S. Occasionally I'll still get to see these beauties in some private or cargo livery flying overhead.Now back to that dream I was telling you about. So there I was, flying the 727 into some SERIOUS clag! (For those who have read my "Round the World" story from a couple of years ago it may seem that 727s and I kind of follow the bad weather. I'm kind of feeling that way too now! Maybe I should hang this bird up for awhile? (http://www.flightsim.com/cgi/kds?$=main/feature/globe.htm )I thought I was never going to break free of the storm...lower and lower I went, fighting all the way down. Better save flight now!Finally, and quite suddenly, I broke free of the clouds and there ahead (sorta) was Dare County Regional Airport. Actually, this was not looking good (pict_05) ! I fight to bring her down but I'm high and outside. Attempt one is no good.Attempt number two looks much better through the clouds....I get her down in one piece! But alas...despite all human efforts I was too fast and splashed off the end of the runway.Attempt number three looks better than number one did. I've decided that landing is not as tough as just getting lined up! Then, I am able to slam the plane down with TWO pictures to confirm my efforts (pict_ 06 and 07 ) Full spoilers, full reverse, full braking, drag my foot and even groan a little and I pull up, still on the pavement. WOW! (For those who want, I've included the WX file for you)From here I was going to just stroll or beam over to KFFA at Kill Devil Hills for the Club's celebration but as I dashed in from the storm I was met by the biggest, hairiest strongest Klingon I've ever seen! (I guess ANY Klingon would meet that criteria huh?) "Come with me." he said, leaving no room for questions. (pict_08) (I know, Worf was from a different series but I always preferred TNG anyway) "Mr. Data, 1903, warp 6. Engage!"Almost before I knew what was happening I found myself strapped to nothing less than a "contraption." Despite the rec's in the readme file, using virtual cockpit on a ZOOM OF 0.40 is THE BEST!! I had read in another review that this aircraft was nearly impossible to fly, so I was ready for the worst, (pict_09) but found that it was MUCH easier to fly than I had feared. So, this lack of reality actually made it kinda fun! (pict_10) I buzzed over my brother....I apparently tried to skydive according to some photos (pict_11) ...and after 12 minutes of flying around I came skidding down to land near (Peter note the theme in my life of not ON...) the runway. (pict_12) I also discovered that you can drag this thing along the ground enough to take off again, so I added it to my hanger! Click here for FS2002 weather file.
DEBRIEFING- "Counselor?""Well, he is a bit shaken, but seems to be telling the truth.""And you say you KNOW this man from Australia, this Peter Stark?""Yes sir.""But you've never MET him have you.""We've only talked, sir.""There are no phone bills on the record.""Captain, according to legends of the time, humans were able to establish voice-only communications over a link on their computers called "The Web", allowing them to talk.""Hmmmm, I see Mr. Data. So now, you want something from us?""Yes Captain. I'd like to go back home. Back to my own time, my own reality and, oh by the way, my own family.""Doctor?""Well, although he has been assimilated by some type of "Club Virus" I see no reason that he CAN'T return...though socially he may be in danger.""Socially?""Yes sir. You see, if he goes back to the real world, his 2003 world, having virtually traveled back 100 years...well, there is the risk that he could say something to someone about the experience and be....""And be what?""He may be considered a little weird, sir.""I see.""Sir? I'd just like to thank Peter for his EFFORTS to bring the past back to life. I'd like to congratulate him for his vision and imagination and I promise to limit my on-line flying to just once a week.""But you WILL still pretend to fly aircraft on your home computer?""Oh, yes sir.""You see Captain, we can't CURE him of that.""Hmmmmm, it does seem a bit odd doesn't it. Well, we certainly can't keep him in September when he needs to get caught up to October so very well then, back he goes.""We'll only have to hope that this Bill Smith fellow makes himself known. Then, in a relative sense, even this "Flounder" will seem quite normal.""Yes. Mr. Worf. Won't you and the good doctor please escort Mr. Flounder to the transporters so we can bring this story to an end?""Gladly sir."